Sometimes

Sometimes it's really hard to talk.
Sometimes it's next to impossible.

It used to be so easy, so free.
I don't really know what changed, but I wish that easiness would return.

I'm sorry for whatever I did, and I want to make it better.
I'm sorry I don't have as much to say as I used to...you know me too well.

I get frustrated because I don't want to leave awkward silence as my answer.
It's so complicated for us, and there's no reason it should be.

I don't think like you, like others.
When I have nothing on my mind, there is nothing.

Others have nothing important on their mind, when I have absolutely nothing.
Even fleeting thoughts are scarce, but I can't make you or others see that I do not think like you.

I'm sorry for being so hollow, so bland and empty and uncharacteristic.
I'm sorry for failing you left and right, time after time after time.

I don't know how to help the situation; I don't know what to do.
I'm sorry...

We made rules, established guidelines to avoid confusion - it doesn't work.
There's still an unspoken tension that neither of us can quite relieve.

I want it gone. I want us back. Why is it so awkward?